My husband and I have been married a little over a year now and are expecting our first child in January. Dear NAH, I am going to just trust you and say, okay, she’s hotter than you. I could discuss evolutionary reasons for this but I would bore even myself.) 2.
But I want to focus on another reason: our impulse to measure the traits of potential partners and use them to make comparisons among them, which can lead us to worry that we've sold ourselves short and "settled" for less than we deserve. One says that there is just one person we're "meant" to be with, and the other says everybody's about the same—but some are just a little better than others. Any pointers on how to help me get over this or something I should do? This reader is probably in her 20’s so go back and empathize with the fact that 99% of people in that age range care that the entire world not think they are in love with Jabba the Hut. I then find myself looking through all her pictures and criticizing myself on everything I could change about me to be that beautiful, that maybe he could find me prettier than her.. I just cant shake that he thinks she’s prettier than me, I’m even believing it now and my self esteem is going right down the drain. (Don’t send me hate mail about how you or your husband are so self actualized that you don’t care if the whole world thinks you’re dating the ugliest person on earth. Or guys can also be completely dismissive once they see me in person and say, "You seem much taller in your photos" or "I didn't realize how short you were until you got off that stool." I recently had one guy actually look over my head to see if the person he was meeting was someone else besides me. But of course in a completely contradictory way, I'm usually attracted to men who are much, much taller than I am.So I guess opposites attract, or I just enjoy the awkward interactions/comical antics of doing activities with someone much taller than I? Standing out (physically) my whole life has led me to be much more confident and fearless of being different. There are definitely a lot of great guys who only see six feet as one small part of who I am.“If someone is too good-looking, too rich, too successful—it might make the average person uncomfortable.”The phenomenon, says Sussman, is by no means limited to women. “I have a lot of really beautiful female clients and they say no one asks them out—a beautiful girl at a bar, maybe there’s ten guys that want to buy her a drink but no one does because they’re intimidated.”David Coggins, a writer in New York, heartily agrees: “Of course beautiful women are intimidating.